Kat-
I used to find you side-splittingly hilarious and send links
of your posts to friends and family. For god sakes woman, find your wallet and
get a job! This is not going well!!
Well, shit! (I thought to myself) – there’s my problem! All this time that I’ve been worrying about finding steady employment in the worst economy since 1930, stocking up on one-dollar packets of rice and beans, and trying to get my identity back with a mere two days left until Christmas – I never once stopped to consider your needs, commenting person. And now, selfish motherfucker that I am, I have finally seen the error of my ways: I am like a latter-day Scrooge, and you, dear sir or madam, are my Tiny Tim.
I can practically hear your tiny, horrifying club foot dragging across the bare, cold floor as we speak.
But really, before I find myself hosting a nocturnal progression of Christmas ghosts (and, God forbid, sobbing in a graveyard while wearing a dressing gown), I’ll stop worrying about lost things. My job, my wallet, my virginity… well, I’ll have plenty of time to worry about them after the holidays. There are so many other, funner things to worry about instead.
Like, say, whether I might be sending the wrong message by giving my little brother a giant bottle of Bailey’s less than twelve months after he got his license suspended for DUI.
God bless us, every one! (Be back after Christmas.)
11 comments:
It's funny that you should mention that anonymous comment because when I read your wallet post I got stuck on it. I was going to comment and then I was so irritated with how rude that was I lost my train of thought.
Also, how come any time some one decides to be rude they do it anonymously?
Wow.
Well if you're considering our needs now, can I have a pony?
;)
Aside from the obvious "call the cab company", try to post on Craig's List.
Also, are you sure that you lost it in the cab? Maybe try and put up signs in the area around your destination to see if it fell out while getting out of the cab.
Also try the local police station. Sometimes people will drop them off there.
Hopefully some good soul will drop it in the mailbox for you!
I'm always amazed at the number of people who don't return things they find. I once lost an expensive ($300 expensive) sweater belonging to a friend while drunk and high on the bus. Did someone give it to the bus driver to put in the lost and found? No. Did someone keep the sweater? probably.
I wrote that comment. Just kidding. I don't even know HOW you write a comment annonymously.
But anyway, I did post that wallet plea on my friend's facebook wall cause her and all her friends live in NYC. I wish I could help more. :(
Kat-
Hey, this is going to sound pretty ridiculous but I'm the person who posted the aformentioned shitty comment.
Long story short- that was incredibly rude and completely unnecessary. I think last night, after coming home after a few bottles of wine, it sounded pretty funny in my head.
It's not funny. At all.
I hope you do find your wallet and have a wonderful holiday. I look forward to your posts in 2009.
Sorry for being a jerk!
Awww, I think anonymous deserves some Christmas cheer. A nice apology don't you agree? We've all been drunk and retarded while blogging at least once this year haven't we?
aww, Anonymous. That was lovely. And considering that massive alcohol consumption was the contributing factor to losing my wallet in the first place, I can certainly relate. (But that's a story for another time.)
Three cheers for Anonymous, Merry Christmas to all.
Yay!
I love a story with a happy ending...except you don't have your wallet back yet...
Kat-
Wallet yet?
At least they apologized. That was nice. Most of my Anon's are just irritating asses.
Fabulously Broke in the City
Just a girl trying to find a balance between being a Shopaholic and a Saver...
Mmmm..rice and beans..LOL
Considering our needs: I too would like a pony.
Hope you find your wallet!
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