Comments on pink india ink: For the last time, I am NOT stealing that dog.

I Love How you called the guy in the weelchair "ge...

2009-12-19T05:23:18.851+01:00

I Love How you called the guy in the weelchair "gentleman" the second time around..
-Utterly Impressed & Entertained.

It gets...MUCH...worse..when you have children. ...

2009-12-10T01:44:26.661+01:00

It gets...MUCH...worse..when you have children.

What would happen if we reenacted the scene from GOONIES with the blender?

What would Husband do if I used all his old high school sweaters for diapers?

How much $$ could I get if I sold just one baby? It isn't like I don't have another....

What's I say?

Yeah, me too. The worst was standing at the alter...

2009-11-21T11:55:52.809+01:00

Yeah, me too. The worst was standing at the alter and I heard the words 'do you take this man?' and my brain was all 'what would happen if you said no?'.

Me too, me too, me too. Know what else my obsessiv...

2009-11-20T23:26:17.640+01:00

Me too, me too, me too. Know what else my obsessive planner brain likes to do? Calculate every possible conversation / interaction with someone at least 10 years into the future. So: "hey, that guy is cute...what if you said this...and then went out on a date...BUT WHEN YOU GET DIVORCED IN TWENTY YEARS, WHO WILL GET THE HOUSE????" Not sure I've ever had a spontaneous conversation...yet it rarely seem to prevent me from saying insanely idiotic things.

we need a support group because my diseased brain ...

2009-11-20T18:22:57.768+01:00

we need a support group because my diseased brain does this too. like if I'm standing in line somewhere and i can see a lady's wallet in her purse, my brain is like "you should take that wallet and then HAND it to her to show her how vulnerable to crime she is." Or like if I'm at the grocery store walking by a fruit display, my brain tries to get me to kick it over, just because I can, and WOW, WHAT WOULD HAPPEN, GUYS???

It's exhausting being the responsible one up in here. So I feel for you.

Oh, thank GOD it's not just me. I also tend to im...

2009-11-20T18:07:52.501+01:00

Oh, thank GOD it's not just me.

I also tend to imagine really horrific car accidents. Particularly when I'm driving next to an 18-wheeler. The truck will merge into the lane next to me and my brain says "Here, watch this movie I just made about what would happen if that truck kept merging and squashed your teeny little car between it and the wall of that overpass up ahead." And then I have to remind myself to breathe, and I have to fight the urge to start calling my friends and family to tell them I love them all before I die.

Now, instead of panicking, I'm going to picture you running naked through the streets of NYC, stealing dogs and wheelchair-bound veterans. It's like picturing the audience in their underwear, only funnier.

Hilarious. That is all.

2009-11-20T17:50:44.012+01:00

Hilarious. That is all.